Another line of one liners for you guys, and here is what Is the file I created and read from, as always, so did not make the cut, and some changed, and lots of spelling errors

Who do you think would win outta the fligingo and the lawn gnomes? I think the gnomes would win, because they can organize, they smoke pipes

I always wondered why they called it the leaning tower of pizza, then I realized, it was leaning towards a pizza shop

You know when you have a dream within a dream…that’s trippy

Has someone ever told you that your hair looked like a bush…me either, that’d be rude

The penguins can’t fly, I suggest we attach 200 balloons to it so it knows what it’s missing

I want a tee shirt, made of t’s

Why did the dodo get so popular, what about all the other things that are extinct, I say we give them a chance

Do you think some cavities go to work and say man I hate my job, I wish I was a four leaf clover

My friend was drunk and said that nothing makes sense, I asked him what nothing was

It’s like killing two birds with one stone… that’s one violent stone

It’s raining men!!! Ouch, that would be very painful

I love cheesecake, but I don’t love cheese and cake, together

I just found out what movie ratings meant, I always thought they meant G for good, PG for pretty great, PG-13 for Pretty great to the 13 power, and R for pirate speak, which means cool

My girlfriend has a heart of AU, that’s gold on the periodic table of elements

The desert is the most formal place there is, not really, but they do have cac tie

Anything you can do I can do better, well I suck at everything thanks for rubbing it in

I’m tired of seeing barley legal on porn sites, I want to see a site that has old women and the tag line is barely alive…no never mind, I don’t want to see that

A E I O U and sometime Y because he doen’t like to hang out with those fuckers all the time

Rice cakes are some deceiving mothers, they only have rice flower in them

I find that once a pencil loses it’s erasher, that you become perfect, because you no longer make mistakes, nope you meant to spell that word wrong

When I was little I colored my butt with highlighter, that’s just embarsing, but it was am empisieed butt